THE DOWN SEX/DOWN HUGGING CONTRACT
by Dr. Lawrence Wilson
© December 2021, LD Wilson Consultants, Inc.
All information in this article is for educational purposes only. It is not for the diagnosis, treatment, prescription or cure of any disease or health condition.
Why Do Down Sex or Down Hugging?
Problems With Down Sex And Down Hugging
1. General Agreement
2. Emotional/Sexual Aspects
3. Ego or Control Aspects
4. Social Aspects
5. Teamwork Aspects
6. Intellectual Aspects
7. Spiritual Aspects
WHY DO DOWN SEX OR DOWN HUGGING?
At this time in history, there is a great need for rapid development, particularly for women. Women develop more slowly than men.
However, when doing down sex or down hugging, writing up a contract is important to avoid problems with these methods.
PROBLEMS WITH DOWN SEX AND DOWN HUGGING
1. Blending problems. Any time a man and woman are in close contact, their energy field or aura blends with that of the other person. This can be upsetting to one or both of the partners. This can slow development.
2. Safety problems for both the woman and the man. The woman could experience rape, molestation or other physical harm. However, the woman could also harm the man, especially if she is trained for combat.
Another problem is that the man may take liberties with the woman such as kissing or rubbing simply because it is easy to do. The closeness of the bodies may be interpreted as a signal that taking such liberties is okay when it is not. The woman could take liberties with the man, as well, for the same reason.
3. Psychological safety problems. Down sex or down hugging can cause embarrassment, humiliation, or a kind of confusion about love and intimacy.
4. Disease. Intimacy, even just hugging, can easily spread infections that are on the hands, the skin, elsewhere on the body or even just on one’s clothing.
5. Pregnancy. This can occur with down sex and the couple must take precautions to avoid it.
An answer for these problems is a short contract between the down sex or down hugging partners. We suggest that all couples that want to do down sex or down hugging write up and sign such a contract.
It is not so much for legal reasons as it is to avoid confusion and unwanted ‘side effects’ these procedures. It can help both the man and the woman to relax, and this is essential for rapid development.
Here is a sample contract for down sex or down hugging. Words in parentheses are for explanation. This contract is organized according to the 7 system. For details, read the Energy Centers.
This legally binding contract sets forth the terms and conditions of our down sex or down hugging arrangement.
1 LEVEL. PHYSCIAL ASPECTS
A. Intent. We will never knowingly harm each other in our thoughts, words or actions.
B. Frequency and duration. We agree to have a down sex or down hugging session _____ (daily, every second day or every third day). We will do our best to allow the session to complete, which requires somewhat more than two hours. We can take breaks to stretch, change positions or for other reasons.
C. Cleanliness. We agree to always do all we can to assure the safety and health of ourselves and our partner. This includes strict cleanliness, and to fully honor and respect each other at all times. We also agree to be kind, considerate, polite and patient with each other at all times.
D. Disclosure. We agree to disclose to each other any illnesses or infections that we currently have, including their location and type. This is to minimize the spread of disease.
E. Accidental harm. If we harm one another accidentally through words or actions, we agree to 1) apologize immediately and 2) learn not to repeat it. We both need to learn this if we are to be happy together.
F. Clothing. We agree to wear ______ type of clothing (how much and what kind) during down hugging or down sex.
G. Other touching or physical activities during down sex or down hugs. We agree that the following are allowed _____ and the following are not allowed _____ (this can include kissing, rubbing, fondling, tickling, holding points on the body, or other.)
(This is important because if it is wanted, it can help the partners relax, add enjoyment, and may speed up development. However, if it is not wanted, it can definitely interfere with relaxation and cause fear and anger.)
2 LEVEL. SEXUAL/EMOTIONAL ASPECTS
A. With down sex and if pregnancy is possible, we agree to always use contraception.
B. (If this agreement is about down sex), we agree to only have down sex, and not regular sexual intercourse unless we both agree to it.
(If the agreement is about down hugging), we agree there will be no sex at all.
C. We agree to always exercise the utmost care, consideration, cherishing and respect for each other in the sexual area. We agree to do our best to avoid any physical, mental or emotional harm, embarrassment or humiliation in this area.
D. We agree to discuss our needs and wants in this area openly, as often as needed. For example, one or both may want to use down sex sessions to help resolve past traumas.
E. If unmarried, we agree to disclose to each other if we are dating or having any intimate contact with anyone else.
(It is best while this contract is in force not to date or have sex with anyone else. This is because dating others can cause more spread of disease and mixes up the energy, which slows development.)
3 LEVEL. POWER AND CONTROL.
A. We agree as to who will make the decisions regarding the down sex or down hugging sessions. Often, the one in charge will be the more developed partner, but not necessarily.
4 LEVEL. FAMILY AND FRIENDS.
A. We agree to limit all of our friendships and family contacts so they do not interfere with our down sex sessions. This means restricting the number and length of all emails, phone calls and visits to and from our friends and other family members.
B. If one or both of the partners is married to someone else, he or she must obtain written permission from the spouse to do down hugging or down sex for development and show this to the other partner. This is to avoid marital problems and for clarity and honesty.
C. We will discuss how down sex or down hugging fits into each partner’s larger social life and situation.
5 LEVEL. TEAMWORK
A. Down sex for development is a team effort. We agree to work together as a team, at all times. This includes planning our down sex sessions together.
B. We agree to do the pulling down exercise during all down sex sessions.
C. We agree to at least consider other enhancements of the down sex sessions such as visualizations, deep breathing together, neck pulls, jolts, and spinning the three energy centers.
6 LEVEL. UNDERSTANDING AND COMMUNICATION
A. We agree to deepen our understanding of down down sex or down hugging.
B. We agree to communicate honestly and openly. During each down sex session, we agree to devote a few minutes to check in with each other, to see how things are going. We will allow each other to speak freely about anything having to do with our sessions.
7 LEVEL. SPIRITUAL ASPECTS
A. We agree to continue with a complete development program in order to enhance the effect of down sex or down hugging.
Down sex is part of the philosophy of development. We both agree to support this concept and live by its tenets.
A. Duration. This contract is valid for a period of ____ months. At the end of this time, if the partners wish to extend it, they may negotiate a new contract.
B. Termination. Either partner can terminate this contract at any time. No explanation for termination is required.
C. Legally binding. If one or both partners break this contract, the down sex arrangement ends until a new contract is negotiated.
D. Privacy and confidentiality. All matters relating to this arrangement shall remain private and confidential, unless we both agree otherwise.
Also, if a breach of privacy occurs, we agree to heal it as rapidly and thoroughly as possible.
E. Integrity agreement. If we become embroiled in a dispute that we cannot solve ourselves, we agree not to consult attorneys. We agree to first consult a mediator whom we choose together, to resolve our problem. If this does not work, we agree to binding arbitration by an arbitrator whom we choose together.
F. Amendments. We may amend this contract at any time by mutual agreement. Amendments must be dated and signed by both of us, preferably in the presence of at least one witness.
G. Complete contract. This agreement constitutes the entire contract between us.
In some cases, other issues will arise that can be handled by adding clauses to this contract. Examples are:
1. Financial arrangements. This might come into play if a person wants to pay for down sex, and another person is willing to accept payment.
2. Living arrangements. It might be helpful if the partners live together. If they are not married, this may require more agreement regarding where they live, eating and sleeping arrangements, transportation agreements and more.
3. Transportation to and from sessions or other matters.