INTIMACY TALK FOR MEN
by Dr. Lawrence Wilson
© November 2017, LD Wilson Consultants, Inc.
All information in this article is for educational purposes only. It is not for the diagnosis, treatment, prescription or cure of any disease or health condition.
This article is one of the most important on this website. It is written specifically for men, to understand their wives better.
PROBLEMS OF MEN
These are problems that arise when we wish to match men up with women in marriages. Men, please work on them.
1. MANY ARE SEDUCERS, AND A FEW ARE RAPISTS. This is the most serious problem with most men. They do not understand that seduction of a woman, even if you intend to marry her, is rape. Women are easy targets. Most men use them for sex, fun, excitement, distraction, entertainment, slaves, sport, and more.
This is all reprehensible. Until it changes, men will suffer the consequences of their actions – women who are angry, unhappy, and often raped because there was no good man there to save her.
2. EXPLOITERS OF WOMEN. Even if a man is not a rapist or seducer, most are exploiters. This means that if a woman offers herself for sex for any reason, he will take advantage of the situation for selfish reasons and not think of her best interest.
This problem is not as bad as the first situation, but it is still unacceptable. Women have some problems that can cause a woman to offer herself for sex. Men are supposed to protect them from it, not use them.
3. WANDERERS. This is not about sex. It means that many men do not focus on their relationships or marriages enough. Instead, they wander off and focus on work, friends, hiking, cycling, hunting, fishing, boating, other hobbies, football games, and more.
This is also reprehensible. The wife and family come first, and always first. The rest is generally a stupid waste of time, energy and often money, as well.
4. ALCOHOL AND/OR RECREATIONAL DRUGS. These scare women, and they should. Women are physically weaker and a man who is even slightly drunk or stoned is always dangerous to have to be around. Give up the alcohol and drugs when you want to have a wonderful relationship, even if she wants a drink now and then.
5. WANDERING EYES. This is when a man looks at every pretty girl on the street, even when he is with his wife. While not a horrendous habit, women definitely don’t like it.
6. SEXUALLY LOOSE. Men have many more affairs than women. It is not just that women fear pregnancy and diseases more. It is that women are more loyal, and they are smarter in this area. Many men have a long way to go to catch up to their wives on this issue.
7. STUBBORN EGOS. Some men have this problem. It ruins marriages, and sours many otherwise excellent relationships.
8. NOT WILLING TO DO DOWN SEX. This is more esoteric, but there is a sexual technique that heals the body and the brain, and develops the couple in amazing ways. It is called down sex.
Women have an easy time with it and enjoy it. Men have a more difficult time with it, and so many won’t do it.
This is very unfortunate for them, and for their wives and partners. It means that both suffer needlessly with illness, mental problems and short lives. We hope this changes. For details about the technique, read Down Sex.
WOMEN’S SEXUAL DISEASES
These are more common and more severe than those of men, in most cases. The reason is that hers are inside a warm, moist environment that they like. Also, they cannot be seen so they are often ignored.
This is important because women are often unaware they have sexually-transmitted diseases, so be careful. Always use several condoms and take other precautions, like no sex on dates.
WOMEN AND DEVELOPMENT
Women want to develop as much as men. However, it is much more difficult for them. So please help your woman develop by doing down sex, even if it is not your favorite activity. Also, help her to eat very well, sleep a lot, go to bed early and follow her nutritional balancing program, which powerfully supports development. For more details, read Introduction To Development.
This is a key to all relationships, so don’t ignore it. You will find that women often cannot be as forthright and honest as men in their communication. This is because they run scared all of the time.
Women are often afraid they will offend you, cause you to become so angry that you strike them or rape them, or that you will scream at them, something never ever to do to a woman if you want to keep her around.
So be gentle with communication, but persistent. Try to find out what she really thinks and feels. Don’t settle for evasion or “trying to keep the peace”, which is a tendency of all women.
Try to communicate every day. Set aside time that is convenient for both of you – just a few minutes may be enough unless there is an important issue to discuss. In this case, set aside an hour when you are both relaxed with no distractions.
Something women do not like is the “silent treatment”, where you won’t say anything about a subject. Don’t do this if you value your relationship. (You can also tell her to please not do this, either.)
Women often communicate more through their bodies and body language than through words, so look for this. She may dress differently, wear her hair differently, or act differently in bed. Be aware that this is communication and she is sending you messages, even if she is not fully conscious of them. They may be saying, “You are not paying enough attention to me”, or “I’m bored”, or “I’m sick”, or “What are you feeling about me right now?”
MEN SHOULD ACT AS STABILIZERS OR POLES FOR WOMEN
A pole, such as a flagpole, is straight, strong, somewhat flexible but not wishy-washy, and firmly grounded or rooted. Men need to be somewhat like this.
While the analogy is not totally accurate, it is not far from the actual structure of the male body, in relation to the female body. The male is stronger, less flexible, taller, straighter and harder to move. In contrast, the female structure is shorter, more flexible, and more easily influenced and swayed.
When men act as poles for their women, the women are usually much happier and much healthier. The women are also far safer.
Of course, there are some women who do not want a stable, “straight” man in their life. They prefer a wimp whom they can manipulate.
If you are this kind of woman, please think about it carefully, as the type of man you desire is not going to protect you and, in most cases, you will be bored with him sooner or later and regret your decision to marry him or even be involved with him at all.
The energy centers and the pole analogy. Man’s primary energy centers are the 1, 3, 5, and 7 energy centers. Centers 1 and 7 point almost straight down and straight up. These connect men better than women to the earth and to the heavens or higher realms. This is the energetic reason why the man is said to be more like a pole, because he is more connected to the earth and to the higher realms.
In contrast, woman’s main energy centers are the 2, 4, and 6 centers. She is therefore less oriented to the earth and heavens. She is more oriented toward connecting with others or relationships with others. Energy center 2 has to do with one-on-one sexual relationships. Energy center #4 has to do with social and business relationships. Energy center #6 has to do with relationships with others in a loving and more universal way.
These are women’s specialty areas. Man and woman together can connect all of these, for maximum happiness. However, man must be the pole or the relationship will suffer. For details, read Poles And Climbers.
THE SEXUAL ORDER
This controversial idea is that while women may, in some cases, be smarter than men, most of the time women do not make as good decisions as men. The reason is that women are more fearful, and often more concerned with appearances than are men, in general.
As a result, it is often best for the man in a marriage to make the final decision if there is disagreement between them. Some men hesitate to do this, fearing it may end the marriage, or to avoid conflict.
However, quite the opposite is often true. By the man insisting on making the final decision, it can save a marriage. For details, read The Sexual Order.
WOMEN’S FEAR LEVEL
Men all need to know that women, generally, are much more filled with fear than are men. The reasons are that women are physically weaker and smaller, and they are more attractive and targets of predation, rape, seduction and abduction.
MOST WOMEN HAVE BEEN MOLESTED, AND MANY HAVE EXPERIENCED RAPE
This is a fact of life. It does not matter how old or young she is, or other life circumstances. Please beware of this men.
It also explains many types of behavior, dress, fears, anger and much more. Some men think they can find a woman who has not experienced molestation, but it is extremely rare or impossible. You are part of her healing, so please accept this role and play it well.
HOW MUCH SEX IS BEST?
The answer is NO regular, ordinary, or up sex. You can have down sex daily or at least twice weekly to develop the bodies as fast as possible.
Women always prefer down sex to ordinary sex. Women are delicate and down sex is much gentler, safer in regard to pregnancy and disease transmission, extremely healing and just as much fun. It is also much better for men.
Men will have to practice down sex to do it successfully. Do not become discouraged! It works. Read the article Down Sex.
If you must do ordinary sex: Men should not lose their sexual fluid more than once a week, and much less if you over about 35 years old. This is quite important today. Most men are not that well nourished, and even if you are, it is still true. Just because it seems as though another man can do it more often, it does not matter.
Also, women are much more delicate in the genital area than men, so never go hard and fast. Read below about going too long, which is a rape.
MEN SHOULD CLEAN, COVER AND PLUG THEIR WIVES OFTEN
CLEANING A WOMAN
This may sound unusual, but women pick up various types of harmful souls very easily, mostly in the pelvic area of their body. This occurs because women are set up to attract men for the purpose of reproducing the species.
This attractiveness brings in more than men, however. Among them are:
1.Discarnate entities. These are souls who were inside human or animal bodies that have died. However, the souls are still around and some find their way inside of women. There they can irritate her tissues, influence her thoughts and cause other mischief. For details, read Entity Attachment And Release.
2. Prongs. Some entities easily pass into the vagina and uterus and remain stuck there. These are called prongs, because some women are aware of their presence.
They cause a prickly sensation in the vagina, like having little thorns inside. Often, these women consult their doctors for the problem. They perform a vaginal exam and find nothing wrong.
These women feel better after having sex with their husbands or boyfriends. However, the relief does not last long. The problem usually returns after about a week. This is because the woman picks up more prongs, especially if she spends a lot of time outside her home. For details, read The Prongs.
3. The wells. Entities or stray souls also collect in two areas of a woman’s body called the wells. These are located between a woman’s knees and her vaginal area, in between the legs – one in the front and one in the back of the body.
When the legs are together, the wells bunch up in front of her body. When she spreads her legs, they drop into the space between the legs.
The effect of the wells is somewhat similar to the effect of the prongs and the discarnate entities, which are found in the wells, as well. The woman will feel somewhat unclean, irritated, and can be mentally influenced by entities or souls that are trapped in this area of her body.
The reason this occurs is similar to the reason for the discarnates and the prongs. The pelvic area of a woman is extremely attractive or centripetal in energetic terms. This is how she attracts a mate for reproduction of the species.
Men do not have this problem. The problem is worse for women who are out in the world, as opposed to those who stay at home, but it happens no matter where they reside and work. For details, read The Wells.
Clearing the entities, the prongs and the wells. A woman’s husband or partner can clear these entities easily, in most cases, if they live together and if they are involved sexually. This is a hidden reason many women marry and want to have regular sex. In other words, sex is not just about intimacy, pleasure, or distraction. It is about clearing stray souls from her pelvic area.
The way this is done, men, is you insert the penis fully, and then slowly withdraw it, using a sucking action as though the penis were a soda straw. Doing this about 5 or 6 times often – perhaps daily, if you and your partner want it this often – will remove these stray energies that really bother some women. Other women are less aware of them, but the problem affects them all.
Preferably, do not have an orgasm during this procedure, and your wife need not and best not have one either. If it occurs, it is not a problem, but it is not related to orgasms at all. In fact, they get in the way of this cleansing procedure.
Always do this procedure very gently, as women are much more sensitive in the vaginal area than men are in their genital area, as explained below.
SEX FOR MEN IS NOT THE SAME AS SEX IS FOR MOST WOMEN
Sex for most men is mostly a physical and perhaps an emotional release. For women, it is much more:
1. Often intense pleasure not felt by men.
2. Psychological safety and security. It helps a woman confirm or know that she is loved, and that she is accepted for who she is.
3. Touch. This is very important for some women. It is important for some men, as well, but often not as much as it is for many women.
4. Cleaning and plugging, explained above.
5. Conception, if this is desired.
This is important for all men to know.
WOMEN BOND TO MEN DURING THEIR ORGASMS.
An important physiological difference between men and women is that women bond to men when they have an orgasm. At this time, a women’s energy field expands and includes her partner. During orgasm, in most cases, a man’s energy field around his body does not expand nearly as much and sex is mainly a physical action that may feel good, but the effect stops there.
SEX FOR WOMEN MUST BE GENTLE AND YOU MUST STOP IMMEDIATELY WHEN SHE SAYS STOP OR YOU WILL DO A LOT OF DAMAGE AND ARE LIABLE TO LOSE YOUR PARTNER
A critical fact about all women is their genital organs are much more sensitive and delicate than those of a man. This is critical to know and recall at all times. One may think that women must be very tough because they carry and give birth to children. However, their sexual organs are much more delicate than those of any man.
For this reason, sex with any woman must always be gentle. This is a definite rule that must not be broken if a man values his relationship at all. If a man is ever rough with his wife, girlfriend or committed partner, even once, it will often ruin the relationship forever.
What does rough mean in this context? It means any of the following:
1. Asking for sex too frequently. Most women are very happy with sex once a week or so. Few want more than this, except those with sexual fluid craving disease, as discussed below. An exception is if you do down sex. This she may want and need several times a week.
2. Going too long. This means continuing intercourse and pumping, in particular, for more than about 10-15 minutes in most cases. Most women are very satisfied with a few orgasms and shorter intercourse.
The reason is that going longer will deplete the woman’s sexual fluids and she will be tired for hours or even days afterwards. Women and men need to hold onto their sexual fluids for optimum health and development.
Going too long is the primary reason for many breakups and divorces. Most men do not realize this because their ladies have usually tried gently to stop the men during sex and the men just don’t get it. They think that women are like men, and men like to go longer, at times, so the woman must enjoy it too, as she is having orgasms. Gentlemen, please listen. It does not matter how many orgasms the woman has, or even if she has any at all. She always knows when she is tiring out and it is time to stop.
Men must stop immediately when your partner asks, not five minutes later or even one minute later. Otherwise you may well lose the relationship and you may never know why. It is worse than messing up the bathroom, leaving clothes on the floor, not making enough money, or other common complaints women have about their men.
Women have also been known to become violent if their man does not stop immediately when they request it. So keep this in mind, too.
Spousal rape and domestic violence. When a man goes on after a woman says please “Stop, I have had enough.”, it is rape and a form of domestic violence, pure and simple. The official name for it is spousal rape, or perhaps date rape if one is not yet in a committed relationship.
It is rape, gentlemen, and the partner will hate you for it, even if she continues to go out with you or continues to live with you forever. She may stay with you for various reasons, but your relationship will never be as good.
Do not listen to locker room talk, television psychologists, or anyone else that tells men that when a woman says she has had enough, that it is okay to go on with sex for even one minute.
SEXUAL FLUID CRAVING AMONG WOMEN IS A GROWING PROBLEM
Sexual fluid craving is a rather strange problem that is common today. It is actually a subtle nutritional imbalance in which a woman feels the need to have more and more male sexual fluid because it gives her a lift, a ‘zing’, or a boost that lasts from a few hours to a few days or even a week or longer.
Without the sexual fluid, the woman feels rather depressed and tired. The problem is growing, and is worst among younger women, vegetarians, semi-vegetarians, vegans and among women who have been raped or even molested as children or as adults. These women all share one thing in common. They are in worse general nutritional condition.
Women’s sexual fluid craving is actually very dangerous for men, so please read this carefully and help your partner if she has this condition. You will know she has it because she will practically demand sex, often more than once a week. It is dangerous for men for a number of reasons:
1. Too much sex depletes the male sexual fluids. This is definitely harmful and causes cancer, other illnesses and an early death.
2. If your female partner is not satisfied with your sexual fluid, she may go outside of her relationship with you for sex. She also will not want to use condoms in most cases, as this blocks the absorption of the sexual fluid in her vagina. This combination means she will contract sexually-transmitted diseases in almost all cases, which she will pass on to you if you are not alert and careful in handling this problem.
3. Your mate or girlfriend may even desert you for a more “sexual” man if she has this condition. It can become an addiction, which means that the woman may lie about it, craving it more and more, and acting quite selfish and irrational in many cases. It can be a home wrecker, marriage wrecker and generally a horror.
What to do about sexual fluid craving. The simple antidote for this condition is that a woman so afflicted must eat red meat, especially beef or perhaps lamb, at least three times a week, or maybe more for a while. Red meat can cure the problem, but most women with the condition detest red meat, so it is an effort to overcome this strange aversion to red meat. Vegetarians particularly may not want to eat red meat, but I assure you it works, and it is often the only method that works.
The only thing that works better is a total nutritional balancing program based on a properly performed and correctly interpreted hair mineral analysis. This program will include eating red meat twice or three times weekly.
For more, read Sexual Fluid Craving on this website.
DON’T TALK ABOUT YOUR WIFE OR PARTNER WITH OTHERS, EVER, AT ALL
This is another important point if a man wants to hold on to a good woman. Never, ever reveal details about your sex life or your partner to anyone – not to your closest friend, relatives, parents, children or anyone else. Never, ever discuss it in public, by the way. That is even worse.
The reason for this is that women see sex in a more sacred, special and private way than men do, in most cases. They often discuss it with their girlfriends, but they will get angry in most cases if they find out that their man has been sharing details about it with others of either sex.
WOMEN HATE UNCLEAN BATHROOMS
Men need to know that their penis is designed like a frost-free hose bib. In this type of hose bib, the valve that controls the flow of water is deep inside the pipe.
As a result, when you shut off the flow, it keeps dripping for a minute because some fluid is left in the pipe. Men are built in a similar way. This is why men make a mess when they urinate.
Women hate it, in part because too often they have to clean it up. Women also do not understand why men are so messy because women don’t have the problem.
1. Understand the problem.
2. Explain it to their wives.
3. Must wipe the head of the penis each time you urinate and must hold the tissue there for at least 30 seconds to let the entire pipe empty out.
SIT DOWN ON THE TOILET ALL OF THE TIME
This helps prevent messy bathroom problem discussed above. I realize men think it is a waste of time, but it helps and is not difficult to do.
IF YOUR PARTNER ACTS STRANGE OR ANGRY, HOW TO FIGURE OUT WHY
Here are some of the reasons to always keep in mind:
1. She is pregnant. This is not that common, but of course it occurs, in some cases. This causes significant hormonal changes, mental alterations in some cases, odd cravings for foods, heat or cold in the body, nausea in some cases, and perhaps other symptoms such as odd aches or pains.
The woman may think it has to do with you. It does not, except, of course, that you were, in part, responsible for her pregnancy.
2. Projection. Women and men project their fears, desires, anger and other feelings onto others. It is a common fact of relationships of all kinds.
All you need to do is think about what is going on and ask yourself honestly if you are to blame, or is this something else. That may tell you if projection is occurring.
Women often project their feelings about their fathers onto their husbands and boyfriends, so you may get a clue from this fact. They may also project their feelings about their mothers, but this is less common.
Feelings directed at employers, bosses, supervisors and others in authority may also be easily projected onto male companions as well. Once again, just ask if you are to blame, or is something else occurring.
3. Premenstrual tension, or hormonal changes for other reasons. These are extremely common, especially during the last few days before the menstrual period. Some men keep calendars marked so they are aware of when this is occurring. This only works if the woman’s periods are regular, of course.
Premenstrual syndrome causes irritability, anger, depression, weepiness, sadness, hypersensitivity and can even cause violence in a woman. It is worth understanding and observing if you notice a monthly tendency for your partner to be upset, in pain, or otherwise out of sorts.
4. Retracing. If your female companion is following a nutritional balancing program, which I hope she is, she will go through retracing reactions, or purification reactions from time to time.
These are unpredictable in their timing, their nature and their severity. Most are mild, cause few symptoms, and pass quickly. Now and then, however, one can be intense, can cause mental and emotional symptoms that are awful, and a reaction can last for weeks, occasionally.
This factor may be especially important if you know your wife or female companion has been through any sort of important trauma such as molestation, rape, abuse, beating, a difficult prior marriage, or anything else.
During a retracing or healing reaction, most people lose awareness of the present to some degree. They are literally 2 or 5 or 15 years old again, and going through the same trauma as they did back then, only they are learning how to process it and handle it correctly.
They may become angry, depressed, anxious, fearful, or moody. They may have hateful thoughts, for example, or other deranged thinking. This can be a challenge for her and for you.
If she keeps in touch with her nutrition consultant as to whether changes in her program are needed, our experience is that the symptoms will pass and all will be well.
However, retracing reactions can and do strain some relationships. If you are forewarned, you can more easily relax, not take things personally or “poisonally”, and give her more ’space’ for the time that it can take to get through the reaction.
The main actions are
1. Do not react negatively, if at all possible. That just makes things worse. Reacting can keep her or even trap her in her process, slowing or even stopping the deep trauma healing.
2. Be a stabilizing influence. Give her a hug and remind her that she is healing. Also, rub her feet – several times daily, if you can. It is an amazing, simple and safe way to move the process along much faster. I wish every couple understood this.
5. A need for food, water, rest or relaxation. All of us can snap at others, lose patience, feel dejected or rejected or become angry too easily when we are out of sorts due to fatigue, mainly, but also sometimes due to hypoglycemia or even just a little dehydration. So check on this with your spouse or partner if something occurs and you wonder “Where did that come from?”
6. A need for intimacy or a need to talk more, perhaps. While it may sound odd, some women have a strong need to be close to their man, perhaps sexually, but usually not, and a need to just sit together and talk and perhaps cuddle.
If this is missing, or just if it is needed and not forthcoming, some women, instead of just asking for what they want, will become angry, belligerent, depressed or just ornery and hard to get along with.
Be aware of this need for closeness that some, though not all women, need. It is easy to provide, sometimes almost too easy, by just sitting close on the couch together, or perhaps giving a warm hug or two.
HOW YOUR HEALING REACTIONS CAN AFFECT YOUR PARTNER
Another factor that may be very important in your relationship is when you go through mental/emotional or even physical changes due to a nutritional balancing program, or perhaps for other reasons. These can be quite disruptive for a marriage or committed relationship, and you may not realize it.
Therefore, if you suspect that you are not acting your usual calm, balanced and helpful self, be sure to inform your partner of this! Seek to move through the situation as best you can, asking her for patience and gentle feedback as to what is going on.
NOTE: This is often the best that you can do. As with her healing reactions, when you go through yours, you will be partly in the present and partly back somewhere in childhood – perhaps a 3-year-old or a 10-year-old. It is truly unusual and confusing for all of us.
Both of you should read and re-read the article on this site entitled Retracing And Healing Reactions, and this may help, as well. We have had marriages break up when the man went through fairly severe healing reactions, so this is not something to take lightly.